God only writes best sellers, You are the Star

 

Don’t say you’re not important
It simply isn’t true
The fact that you were born
Is proof God has a plan for you.

The path may seem unclear right now
But one day you will see
That all that came before
Was truly meant to be

God wrote the book that is your life
That’s all you need to know
Each day that you are living
Was written long ago

God only writes best sellers
So be proud of who you are
Your character is important
In this book you are the
“STAR”

Peace be upon you

I have great pleasure in sharing the above poem with you which I received many years ago. At that time I was asking the “W” questions, “Why was I born? Why am I suffering? Why is my life so difficult? Why am I always miserable, depressed, crying, Why, Why, Why?

I did not see the plan ALLAH had for me

Many years later I was guided to do Reiki, which I knew nothing about except that it is was “something of the
unknown”. After the first level, I just “knew” this was for me. I did not fear the unknown and I loved the spiritual contact. I plunged on and on ……………………………

Within a year I completed the Reiki Master/Teacher level.

Six months later, I resigned from my secure job and took another great plunge into the unknown. I wrote two big and bold affirmations (Clever Women Work From Home & World Headquarters for the Joyfully Jobless) and stuck them on a wall where I could see them all day long. I remained “Joyful” while Jobless”. I realized all that came before was truly meant to be

Nine months later I taught my first Reiki class, and in the process gave birth to my first “Reiki Babies” I AM proud of who I AM

Today, 01 April, 2008, I found the above poem. Glancing through my diary I realize, in January of the current year, 2008, I had written in big bold letters I “SHINE” ……… I AM A ……… “STAR”

Write the best seller of your life.

Be guided by Allah/God and the Power of his Spiritual Life Force energy called Reiki. YOU ARE ALL STARS

Tracy McGregor front runner for FHM 100 Sexiest Women 2008

 

Tracy mcregor fhm 100 sexiest 2008DOTTIE HOTTIE: SA model Tracy McGregor, and FHM magazine cover girl and calender babe, is a front-runner in the FHM 100 Sexiest Women in The World 2008 poll, in which you can vote.

Tracy has been modelling for 8 years, 6 of which have been full time. She has travelled to Italy, Spain and Argentina and would love to travel more. Tracy has also studied acting as TV has always been a dream for her. Tracy’s new venture is her ultimate passion, a clothing label called “Little Black Number” Look out for it in stores

Picture: MARK CAMERON/FHM

You may be interested in watching this video of Tracy McGregor supporting the Bokke in their Worldcup victory.

Your Valentine's Day gift from Zaida

 

TODAY IS A GIFT

THIS IS  WHY  IT IS CALLED THE PRESENT” 

MAY  THE  PRESENT  DAY

Be Filled with Wonderful Wishes

Plus Lots and Lots of Hugs and Kisses………………….

May your Chubby Cheeks

Be Filled with the Rosy Glow

Of Lots and Lots of Blushes and Flushes ……………………

May your Arms

Be Filled with Boxes of Chocolates

Plus Bunches and Bunches of Red Roses ………………………….

TODAY  IS  A  GIFT 

May Your Heart be Filled with

LOTS  ……AND …….. LOTS .……. OF  …… LOVE

 

HAPPY    VALENTINES    DAY

Julio Iglesias meets Zaida Ahmed in Cape Town

 

Julio Iglesias and Zaida AhmedEvergreen singing legend Julio Iglesias was in South Africa for his current world tour.

Julio Iglesias is considered the most successful Latin singer ever. Garnering more than 2,600 Platinum and Gold certifications and selling over 250 million records around the world, the legendary artist has performed with everyone from Frank Sinatra to Willie Nelson. Julio is the first and only performer to receive the Diamond Record Award by the Guinness Book of World Records – for selling more records in more languages than any other artist in history. With each new release, Julio Iglesias managed to top his previous successes and, along the way, become one of the brightest and most recognizable stars in the world of popular music.

In possession of one of popular music’ great voices, Julio has crossed all barriers – even that of languages – with his electrifying series of international hits. Aside from his breakneck pace of recording, special appearances, touring, TV show and numerous awards and recognitions, Julio was also appointed as a Special Representative for the Performing Arts, a title he holds to this day. He points out that UNICEF supplies an outlet for him to impact the lives of so many he is otherwise unable to reach. “The world has given so much, it’s important to give something back”, he says.

With the release of his first English-language album in more than 12 years – Romantic Classic – Julio Iglesias continues to bring us new ways of looking at and dealing with romance, while also continuing to perform hundreds of concerts in multiple languages around the world.

Meditation and Reiki healing schedule for Oct/Nov 2007

 

Peace Be Upon You ………Assalaam wu alykum

Gratitude: What a beautiful day, showers of blessings are raining down in abundance upon mother earth cleansing and washing away all our negativity.

Schedule for Healing Modalities: Below are the dates, time and cost of each modality. Please contact me or call (021) 762 4005 to book your place or answer any questions.

Healing Modalities

“Dance Toward your Dream”: Slow mind and body exercises to music – (2 sessions)

  • Friday, 26 Oct, 02 Nov – 8pm-9h30pm R150

“Fly Amongst the Stars”, Meditation (2 sessions): Relaxation of mind and body

  • Sat – 27 Oct, 03Nov 2pm – 3h30pm R150

“Dance Toward your Dream”: Slow mind and body exercises to music – (2 sessions)

  • Friday – 16 Nov, 23 Nov 8pm – 9h30pm R150

“Fly Amongst the Stars”, Meditation (2 sessions): Relaxation of mind and body

  • Sat – 17 Nov, 24 Nov 2pm – 3h30pm R150

REIKI Treatments: by arrangement 1 Hour R100

Podcast interview with Natalie Becker

 

Natalie Becker Scorpion King 2 interviewOn Tuesday, 31 July I sat down with Natalie Becker at La Vie, Seapoint, Cape Town, for my first audio podcast interview. This is a full transcript of the interview.

You can also download the Natalie Becker interview – mp3 (26 mins, 43 seconds 7.7MB).

RT: What is your claim to fame?

NB: Well, what I do for a living, is I’m actress, I’m present a radio and television show, I’m a writer, an MC and a public speaker.

RT: What kinds of things make you laugh?

NB: Absurd humour. Humour without a victim. Unexpected incidents of humour and generally odd and nutty things. For example just situational humour. When something happens out of the ordinary. I wish I could give you a tangible example of something that’s happened recently. Comedy definitely makes me laugh. The absurdity of life. I like to look at the lighter side of life. Even in very dark situations sometimes I find myself laughing or smiling because there are two sides to everything. (RT ? So you would enjoy things like Gary Larson?) …I love Gary Larson, the 5th Wave, movies like War of the Roses, Running with Scissors. I almost always find reality funnier than fiction.

RT: What is your relationship status?

NB: Well, it’s easy to say I’m in a relationship or I’m single. Ultimately we’re always engaging with people. We’re always in a number of relationships. And NO I’m not trying to dodge the question. I guess if you want a simple answer: Yes I’m single and enjoying it. And enjoying spending time with myself; quality time with my family and friends. Just engaging life. But I think we’re always engaging in relationships on a number of different levels with a number of different people. You know we’re creatures like that, we’re social creatures. We are always in a relationship. Relationships or when you call yourself a ?couple? it’s a specific construct. Lot’s of people think you’re either in a relationship or not in a relationship with anyone else. (RT ? I like what you said because it’s like using a label like husband, wife, it limits us.)

RT: What are the kind of things do you find attractive in a man?

NB: I find a sense of humour, attractive. Why, because it usually denotes somebody who is intelligent. Somebody who’s thought about life and who has some sort of philosophy about life. I find many things attractive in many people. I’m interested in life and I’m interested in people. I’m interested in engaging people so I can’t say that I have a list of specific things because I’m continually surprised by what I encounter in people. And I love engaging so I can’t…I don’t have a stereo type, a specific type…sense of humour..perhaps confidence. There’s different types of confidence. Sometimes you have to scratch beneath the surface and people are surprising. You can never judge a book by it’s cover. That’s what I’ve learned. So I’d like to say that I have an open mind when it comes to what’s attractive. (RT: You sound like a wine connoisseur. When it comes with relationships.) lol.

 

Natalie Becker Cape Town model actress VivaDivas.comRT: When you are in a relationship, how do you go about getting what you want out of a relationship?

NB: I’d ask for it. Okay. I think emotional honesty is very important. It’s not always easy. I haven’t always found it very easy. And sometimes you get to know someone and then you feel comfortable asking. But I find generally that emotional honesty, and sharing and it asking for what you want is the best way to communicate your needs to someone. (RT ? I think so many people try to get and that’s where they go wrong.) I agree. I’m there as well sometimes. I don’t always have the confidence to ask. I like to get to know someone. And also to feel my way around. Communicating verbally is fantastic also just to sense things about people. To probe at the mystery of other person. In my experience asking for what we want is best. (RT: Sometimes we need to give ourselves permission to ask for what we want.) Of course! We’re afraid of rejection. We’re afraid we will come across as demanding or needy. If we don’t show who we are, then we are not being honest with the other person. And frankly if the other person doesn’t like who we are, then at least we know that we can move on. So emotional honesty is very, very important. (RT: I think there is a direct link between emotional honesty and emotional intelligence and emotional maturity. It’s something that comes with time. You can’t expect a 16 year old to have the same outlook.) Absolutely. I agree. How would you get what you want out of a relationship? (RT: I ask questions based on their value systems as you know.) There we go. That sounds very “Dr Demartini”. I saw your website and I see you’re a fan. (RT – I’m a big fan) So I am I.

RT: What kind of things turn you off and what turns you on in a relationship?

NB: I think I’m still discovering what turns me off. I don’t really have a list. Emotional honesty turns me on because it denotes confidence and openness. I like that because with openness comes growth and evolution. I like a sense of adventure. I like someone with an open mind, willingness to grow together and discover new things. I think that every one is different and every person is a balance of traits that I guess you could find positive and negative. So you have to accept that and if you want to be with someone you have try and look at the whole person, and accept that if you want to be with them. Get to know those things about them. (RT – Was there anything in a recent past that was a common thread that you picked up that was something that you didn’t like?) That’s such a loaded question! I guess what would turn me on is emotional honesty, and what turns me off is emotional dishonesty because you can see it coming a mile on. I don’t like to judge people. I believe that if you can judge something negative or positive in a person, then there is definitely something there that you can learn and grow from. You learn as much about yourself, as you do from the other person. Coming back to Dr. Demartini, who you’re a great fan of, he says, ?We seek not relationships that make us happy, but relationships that balance us out. So they often display the disowned parts of ourselves.? So I think that it’s about balance and retaining balance perspective when you look at people.

RT: What’s your perspective on opposites attract?

NB: I think definitely. I’ve been there. I’ve seen lots of opposites attract and it comes back to what I said previously, and quoting Dr Demartini when he says, ?we attract people in relationships who we think are going to balance or complete us, so we attract people who may display the disowned parts of ourselves, the parts of ourselves that we don’t like.? So they press our buttons in all the right ways and in all the wrong ways. So we learn something about them from them and something about ourselves.? (RT: So you think It’s a good thing?) I think it’s a great thing! (RT: I like what he says when he says when he says that when two people have similar traits or values, then the other one isn’t necessary!) Laughs out loud! That’s hilarious.

RT: So tell me, do you believe in love at first sight?

NB: I would like to, but then it would depend on how you would define love. (RT: Romantic love!) Then it would be infatuation. I think you can be infatuated at first sight! I think it happens to most people a number of times a day., and of course it’s based on a number of things, based on the other person, based on the other person and what you see and project from the other person.

RT: What is the worst pick up line used on you and did it work?

NB: Probably the worst pick up line used was, ?Don’t I know you from somewhere?? and NO! It didn’t work. (RT: I think that that guy needs to hang himself! (Natalie laughs out loud!)

RT: Have you ever messed up on a 1st date, and did they want to see you again?
NB: Yes! I’ve had first dates who’ve never called me again and then haven’t called or wanted to see me again, so I don’t know what I did that was wrong. So yes, and no they haven’t seen me again. Laughs. (RT: For all we know, you could still be doing it.) I’m trying to improve my hit rate.

RT: When you’re out socialising, do guys react differently when you are alone vs. when you are in a group setting when you’re out and about?

NB: Generally no, because I give out a pretty consistent vibe. When I’m in a group setting I’m usually more relaxed with my friends having a good time, so I imagine I’d be perceived as being more approachable. When I’m alone there are people who approach me, but not often. I think it’s more about me and the vibe that I give off. Sometimes I’m approachable, but when I want to be alone, I can very easily project that. People are generally full of love and are very warm towards me and I’ve not yet had a negative experience with people approaching me. (RT: I really like this quote from Einstein that says: ?The most important question you can ask yourself is, is this a friendly universe?? and you whole outlook in life , your entire experience of life as it unfolds stems from that decision, that you either make consciously; and it’s great if you make it consciously; or unconsciously.) I like that quote! It’s your whole perspective really on how you view the world and how you share your experiences.

RT: Being a role model to women in my opinion, how do you think the feminist revolution has affected life for women in the 21st century?

NB: Thank you for that question and thank you for that complement. I haven’t researched that question, my ex-boyfriend did and I wished that I had spent more time listening to him because he had some amazing views, he is a remarkable man. How I can answer that question for you, is that I have always been an individual. How I define myself is as a citizen of this wonderful world we live in, the universe and then as an individual and then as a woman. It’s never been an issue for me. Personally, I would not say that I am a feminist. I’d say that I’m an independent woman. So first I would say I’m an independent, creative individual who happens to be a woman. We know that being a woman is defining. It means that you’re not a man. There are certain perceptions. (RT: Well you know we’re all women in the womb and at some point there’s something that changes and we end up becoming who we are. If you believe in reincarnation, we’ve all been woman and men at some time.) Yes, I believe there is a balance of both inside ourselves. As I’ve said, it’s never been a defining thing. It’s never how I define myself first.

RT: Among your friends, what kind of relationship issues do you guys discuss? Are you an advisor or are you the one seeking advise? Do they pick your brains or do you all share equally?

NB: We generally all talk equally and we tend to talk over one another, because we all talk a lot. And generally the conversation veers towards sex. It’s just a phase that my girlfriends are going through. We talk about relationship issues. A lot of my friends are quite strong individual, independent women. (RT: Are you able to share what about sex, because I think that a lot of men could learn a lesson or two , if you gave us a hint!) NO! I’m not! (RT: No! It’s not about you, it’s about your girlfriends and we don’t know who they are!) Generally, I’d say most recently we talk a lot about our aspirations, our hopes and our dreams, but most of all when we get together we like to have fun, so I’d say we talk about: love, life, relationships, sex, men, but we end up laughing about it all, when we get together, I think it’s important to make light of things, especially the darker things in life or try to find some kind of meaning, whether it’s ironic or funny. So it veers from quite raucous of men and sex, to quite philosophical talks about our hopes, dreams, wishes, ambitions. That sort of thing. I can’t share any of our sex tips with you! (lol)

RT: What suggestions do you have for woman on ways to be attractive, more confident and more interesting?

NB: I think that it’s important to be yourself . It’s very interesting, it’s honest, respect yourself and invest in yourself.

RT: Do you have any suggestions on how men should approach woman like yourself?

NB: In general men approach women by keep it light at first, be honest. There are no rules. Woman are very intuitive. Be friendly. Engage. And also sense of humour.

RT: Do you have any preferences for an ideal date?

NB: There are different kinds of dates. Spontaneous, intimate and romantic setting. I really enjoy engaging. I really love going to the sea point, going to the beach and collecting shells. The setting could be anywhere, but ambiance is important and enjoying each other’s company.

RT: What do you think about marriage?

NB: I think that marriage has it’s place. It’s a very personal choice. It can really be beautiful.

RT: What do you think about speed dating?

NB: I think that it’s a great way to get to know a lot of people in a short period of time and I look forward to trying it out some time.

RT: What do you think of on-line dating?

NB: I’ve actually tried it out, it’s different. You get to meet all sorts of people and yes, I think it’s fascinating.

RT: What’s your idea of romance?

NB: Intimacy, lips brushing, closeness, ambiance, these are the words that come to mind.


For more on Natalie Becker see her bio page on Goodhope FM. You can also call her agent directly on 021-465-1000 for bookings. Also remember to watch Natalie on Free Spirit, Sundays 9am on SABC3.

Sunflowers…Sunflowers…

 

During the day the Sunflower stands tall, majestic, proud, firmly grounded between heaven and earth, bright sunny blooms face the sun merrily spewing healing energies across Mother Earth.

When the sun sets, their heads slowly bow down to thank Mother Earth for their heavenly day. During the long nights their roots slowly draw the healing energies up from the very centre of the earth while their bodies rest, quiet and peaceful.

When the Sun rises, they awaken, rejuvenated and fresh, their heads slowly start to rise…..

The process starts all over again……Such is life

During the day we stand, tall and proud, during the night we rest, quiet and peaceful.

Idyllically, this is how life should be.

But, is it?????????????

PEACE BE UPON YOU

Sunflower Healing Centre launches in Cape Town

 

A wonderful new Meditation & Reiki healing practice in the heart of Wynberg.

You will meet new and interesting people. Perhaps even learn something new from my Presentation, which is followed by tea and cake.

Allow me to introduce myself. I am Zaida Ahmed “Entrepreneur of the Soul”. This is where the most exciting journey of my life begins…

I love Sunflowers. Tall and majestic they stand, with flowers big, bright and bold. Look at us…look at us…here we are…here we are…they seem to say. Feelings of joy, peace and contentment wash over…me…I am…happy…

My Aim: “Plant a Sunflower seed in all of humanity”
My Wish:
“Humanity accepts the Sunflower seeds and waters them regularly”
My Vision:
“Watch all of humanity flourish and grow”

Sunflower Healing Centre offers you 4 Basic Healing Modalities
1. Meditation – Fly Amongst The Stars

  • Week 1:“Grounding”
  • Week 2:“Arch Angels/Malai’kats”
  • Week 3:“Healing Tool Kit”

Entrepreneurial – Dance Toward Your Dream

  • Week 1: “Inner Certainty”
  • Week 2:“Sound Massage”
  • Week 3:“Stars Across the Sky”

3. Reiki Treatments / Tuition – Reiki

  • Level 1
  • Level 2
  • Level 3 – Master/Teacher

Experience the Elixir of life through Mind Relaxation…So, come on, what are you waiting for? Take that first courageous step ………. RSVP 021 762 4005.

Date: Sat 4 August 2007

Time: 2.30 for 3.00pm

20 Questions with model Shannon Smith

 

Shannon Smith Johannesburg modelShannon Smith started modelling at 18 doing fashion shows, commercials, editorials and then went to London for a year in 2004 to work there and try earn British Pounds! After returing she joined ICE Model Management and has been working non stop ever since! She came 9th in 2005 in FHM 100 Sexiest Women in the World poll and is Miss March in 2006 FHM Calander. Shannon has done TV commercials for Jet, Samsung, Gillette, Shield Deodorant, Danone, and more. She briefly presented Tourism Biz on SABC3 early in 2006 for a few episodes and then decided to do a television presenting course with On Cue Communications, which she has just completed. She has done various voice over work for television commercials and MC work for a few functions and events. Shannon has a Diploma in Event, Conference & Exhibition Management and currently works for an Event company in Rivonia.

RT:What is your current relationship status …and why?
SS:I am currently in a stable relationship with a wonderful guy and I am very happy.

RT:What are the characteristics and qualities you find attractive in a man and why?
SS:Definitely honesty, and he MUST be able to make me laugh- which isnt too difficult. I also like tall guys with good bodies, and I am a total sucker for romance.

RT:How do you as a woman get what you want in a relationship?
SS:I think you need to make it clear in the beginning of every relationship what it is you want out of the relationship and establish boundaries etc right up front so that its smooth sailing right from the get go. If you start off letting little things slide by and not saying anything, you are bound to have problems in the future.

RT:What things do men do that turn you off?
SS:Definitely guys that think they are Gods gift to women. The guys that look in the mirror more than their girlfriends and guys that take longer to get dressed than me- NO WAY!

RT:Do you believe in opposites attract and why?
SS:I think in some relationships opposites attract but not my relationships, I need to have a lot in common with my guy, same interests and goals in life etc.

RT:Do you believe in love at first sight and why?
SS:No, I believe in LUST at first sight, thats how I felt about the guy I am dating now when we first met!

RT:Whats the worst pick-up line that’s ever been used on you by a man and how did you respond?
SS:I dont really hear many pick-up lines, I think guys feel intimidated coming up to me, like I will turn out to be some terrible person and turn my back on them or laugh, but I am actually very friendly.

RT:What’s the most embarrassing date you’ve ever been on?
SS:I went out for dinner to Monte Casino once with a guy, and when it came time to pay the bill he told me he didnt have cash on him so he needed to go draw, when he came back he said he had no cash in his bank either. I had left my purse at home, so I had to call my dad to come pay for the meal, AND he had to ask total strangers for spare change to get out of the parking!!!

RT:How do men react when you are alone vs. when you are in a group setting?
SS:I think guys are more easy going and relaxed when in a group situation and definitely more cocky and sarcastic, but when its just me and a guy alone most guys get all shy and dont have much to say, maybe thats coz I can talk the hind leg off a donkey!

RT:How has the feminist revolution affected life for women in the 21st century?
SS:Well I am no Miss South Africa so I am not gonna be able to give some hectic answer to that question, but I reckon its been exceptionally good for us, we have loads more respect from men, and loads more respect for ourselves!!

RT:What kind of relationship issues do you and your girlfriends discuss most often?
SS:We mostly discuss sexual issues and as we are all getting older, I realised we have started talking more about kids and marriage etc more often, OH DEAR!

Shannon Smith South African modelRT:Do you have any suggestions about what women can do differently to become more successful in dating and relationship with men?
SS:Dont let men push you around, stand up for what u think is right and dont settle for 2nd best, there is definitely the PERFECT guy out there for EVERY woman. NEVER SETTLE!!!

RT:Do you have any suggestions on how guys should approach a woman?
SS:Lay off on the attitude and quit thinking you are THE MAN. Be genuine and funny and charming, DONT SWEAR, I hate men that swear.

RT:What is your idea of the ideal date?
SS:A private dinner table for two on a beautiful exotic beach, eating sushi and watching the sun set, then a walk on the beach after dinner and lying on the beach sand watching the stars above trying to spot shooting stars!

RT:What do you think of Speed Dating and would you ever try it?
SS:No I would not try it but it must work for some people coz I have a very good friend that has a perfectly good relationship and they met in a speed dating experience.

RT:What do you think of Online Dating and would you ever try it?
SS:No I would not try it, its too risky, people are never honest in those things. So you think you are talking to a 25year old Brad Pitt look a like but in actual fact you are talking to a 51 year old divorced father of two!

Checkout Shannon Smith’s MySpace profile for more photos… You can also contact her booking agents through ICE Models and Celebridex. You can also connect with her on Facebook.

Ramon Thomas interviews Goodhope FM DJ Jeannie D

 

Jeannie D in 2010This interview was done face to face in 2005 before Jeannie D got her Top Billing role. She was very popular on Goodhope FM at the time.

RT: My first question is what is your relationship status?
JD: I’m single

RT: And why is that? You are a gorgeous, really vibrant woman.
JD: Yes, but I am still young and I think that my focus for now is my career, and settling myself. I want to be strong for myself, before I can offer someone else anything.

RT: What do you find attractive in a man? And why?
JD: hmmm just a very strong character and personality. For instance drugs, promiscuity, stuff like one night stands and casual sex, is a huge turn off for me.

RT: But how are you going to know what their plans are?
JD: I’ll ask first, I am very upfront! Just somebody that you can connect with, I don’t think you can choose who you want to be with, it just happens, I think the minute I do have a relationship with someone it has got to be that instant chemical reaction, where you just know – okay I can click with this person!

RT: How do you as a woman, get what you want from a man?
JD: I don’t believe in playing games because then you are setting yourself up for disaster, you have got to be completely honest if you are in to someone. How do I get what I want? I’m just honest, and I am, what I am. I don’t play any games! I tell someone what I have to offer at this point in time… so if they can handle it, stick around baby!

Jeannie D's terrific swimsuit body Vivadivas.comRT: What are things that men do, that turns you off?
JD:Physically I like tall well groomed men. So, fat little shorties or someone who doesn’t show pride in themselves is so out of the question – a huge turnoff. When they try to impress me or to buy me it’s the worst thing. Especially in Cape Town, you will get some old dodgy dude who drives a Ferrari and he will think that he can just sweep you off your feet, that is the biggest turn off at the moment. Another turn off is when a guy speaks badly of women, even his ex-girlfriend. And of course when a guy is with me and he checks out other chicks, I cannot handle that.

RT: But surely you can’t blame him in a public place?
JD: But then his focus is not on me, which means: why should I be giving you this much attention if you can’t offer me the same respect. It is all a respect issue!

RT: Do you believe that opposites attract and why?
JD: Yes! I believe opposites attract (and not because of the Paula Abdul song…), but I just believe when you are looking for a partner you are attracted to the things that that other people have, that maybe you don’t have. So if I maybe don’t have patients, I will be turned on by someone who has patience and that inner calm. I really do think you go for people who have aspects that you don’t have in your own personality, another example I can give is, if you are a struggling musician you will obviously be attracted to someone who has got a little more status, maybe a little bit more drive and of course a bit more of a career going for him/her.

RT: Do you believe in love at first sight?
JD:Yes. Absolutely!!! That instant chemical attraction, that is obviously the physical attraction that is helping the love along, but think about it, it is so difficult to meet someone that you connect with on every level. So I think that when you do, and you know it, I think yes it can develop into love and I think strong emotions can stem from that….

RT: Have you experienced love at first sight?
JD: Yes my first love! That was most definitely love at first sight and it lasted for 3 and a half years, we were totally in love!

RT: Do guys treat you differently when you’re alone vs. when you’re with your girlfriends?
JD: Yes they definitely do. I think men try and impress you more when you are with a group of people, I think it must be quite intimidating for a man to approach a woman when she is with a group of people.

Jeannie D hot woman Vivadivas.comRT: So you are better off when you are in a group of people?
JD: No! I think you get to see a sincerer part of that person when you are alone, well being in the nature of work that I am in, I think men are very intimidated initially, and I think they feel that they need to come across in a certain way to almost compete. South Africa is still quite a conservative country, and I think people still see woman as the woman in the kitchen, bare-foot and pregnant and not really being the bread winner! And I can understand where men are coming from if their girlfriends earn more than them, I think that is a huge set back for a man, and I can imagine him to get quite scared, you are affecting his ego and pride.

RT: Are you concerned by that?
JD: No I don’t care, that’s not what it is about. We live in a society where yes those things are important, but personally no! I wouldn’t want to be the someone who wants to be the house-wife, or have the house-husband. I wouldn’t want to support someone but it is not about how much money he has, but I think about being with someone who has a dream and who has a mission, and has a passion towards what he is doing. But then he can earn 10 million rand or 10 rand a month, it makes no difference as long as he has that inner drive.

RT: What do you and your girlfriends discuss about relationships?
JD: My closest girlfriend is also a very successful career woman, so at the moment our only topic of conversation is about how men are so scared off by us…

RT: Do you think the feminist revolution has changed things?
JD: I can’t handle feminism! I think feminists ruined it for real ladies!!! I don’t want to be on the same level as a man, I don’t want to sink that low. But I believe in Chivalry, as much as I want to be successful in my career, I do want to get married one day and I do want to have children, and I don’t want to work when I have those children. So I do want to stay at home as long as they are babies, and then when they go off, I can do my own thing again. But really feminists just ruined it! Because now men are more worried – do I open the door for this woman or will she turn around and scream at me? We are not allowing a man to be chivalrist, you are not allowing him to be a gentleman which is what he actually should be. People have turned our world into something that’s easier to be slugged than it is to make a good effort, good values, good morals or good old fashioned ideas, and if people had to put those into practice, I think they would be a lot happier in their relationships. We wouldn’t have as many divorces as we do now, we wouldn’t have such a high AIDS rate because people wouldn’t need to sleep with every Tom, Dick and Harry to feel full.

RT: On the marriage aspect of it, how do you see it, can one still maintain an interesting fun, loving relationship once married? Or is it really the be-all and end- all of love?
JD: I think people put too much emphasis on the marriage, I mean what is the difference whether you live with your boyfriend or if you are married to him? Nothing! It is a contract you have with the government basically, or with the church, or however you got married. It’s just a piece of paper really, and the same ideas and spark that was there in the beginning should still be there. If you decide you want to spend the rest of your life with this person, it doesn’t mean okay well now that I am married I can stop having sex with him! It just means you have got to build on what you originally started off with. Otherwise what is the point, then you are only with someone until you find better.

RT: Do you have any suggestions for women on how to be sexy, interesting, and beautiful and to get what they want from a relationship?
JD: You know what, a woman can be the ugliest frump in the whole world, but if she has confidence, and she thinks that this fat ass of hers is so sexy she is going to come across as being sexy – it’s all in the attitude!!! You can also get the hottest girl in the world, and she can be the most insecure and miserable thing but she can be gorgeous! She is however not going to be considered sexy because she is biting her nails; she is not coming across with a good attitude or a good karma.

RT: What do you think of the things that woman do wrong when it comes to relationships?
JD: With my experience most recently, woman must never try and think how men think, (on the same token, men must never try and get into the mind of a woman) because what happens in that instance is women get very scared and intimidated! Instead of just treating the person that they are on a date with as a friend, they are just putting too much pressure on, and thinking oh my goodness what now… and basically, what girls end up doing is they sleep with guys too quickly! They also start hounding them with sms’s; they fall in love way too quickly, instead of just letting it grow naturally. They think okay I am only going to get this guy, or he is only going to stay with me if I sleep with him. And yet the opposite happens, a guy is going to get totally turned off, because yes a man will try and sleep with you on the first date, he doesn’t necessarily want you to reciprocate, and chances are if you don’t sleep with him on the first date he will phone you in the morning, and want to see you again. If you do give in, then things are going to get awkward!

RT: What suggestions do you have for guys, in terms of approaching women?
JD: I think guys should start respecting women a lot more, I mean I am generalising – your average guy is out in the club looking for a hot girlfriend, it’s not going to happen! And it comes down to not only lack of respect for women, but also comes down to lack of self respect!

RT: What is your idea of a perfect date?
JD: Honestly, I think there is also too much emphasis placed on that that can almost make someone so nervous, that you are not going to enjoy yourself.

Ryan O'Conner and Jeannie DRT: Okay let me rephrase that, what are fun things to do on a date?
JD: Well summer in Cape Town is the most romantic place and town in the world, because you can simply go and get yourself a take-away pizza, nice bottle of wine, two gorgeous little wine glasses and go to the beach, and watch the sunset – it’s absolutely picturesque and everything is there! The mood, the scenery and the aesthetic surroundings. Definitely would be my favourite thing to do on a date. Otherwise something that is totally unexpected, I think the element of surprise is always keen on a date. So if you could totally do something to a girl that she is not expecting and totally sweep her off her feet, she is going to fall in love!! The element of surprise is just priceless and a beautiful memory!

 

Jeannie D has left Goodhope FM and now works on Top Billing full time. Access her profile on Top Billing here.